Taking Shape (Blog 9)

 

I return.

I began editing about a week after finishing up on Matt’s shoot, editing together a basic assembly cut. I’m now closer to a rough cut, and the shape of the film is looking quite good.

I’ve been in regular contact with Sophie, discussing possible motifs and sound design ideas, which have been both productive, and very creatively fulfilling. My initial plan for the score changed upon these conversations furthering, a more horror/thriller influenced tone has now paved way for the music to have a more emotional core. My main initial inspiration was the track ‘Death’ from the film Under The Skin, which makes great use of high strings to invoke fear, lack of control, and being hunted, which are themes of the original script of the film that people in my feedback reacted positively to, and felt was a good representation of anxiety. Sophie pointed out to me that rather than make it present like a typical horror film with those inflections, bringing out the emotion of the scene, about the look into anxiety itself, by making the majority of the score piano, would be more powerful. After hearing examples from her, that’s what we’re working with now.

The big personal revelation during this period is that, while I have not been diagnosed, I have been told by a trusted friend, on a career path of counselling and mental health care, I probably have anxiety myself. This led to a) me slowing down the workload on the film, and b) readjusting my outlook on the film, and figuring out any details that needed tweaking. Chief among these is the removal of the positive voices towards the end of the panic attack. I knew going in and while shooting that this aspect of representing anxiety wasn’t as fully grounded in reality as other moments in the film, but due to positive feedback I received I figured it would be forgivable if it worked in the moment. More important to me than that is the true representation of anxiety; after a discussion with Sophie about scoring the moment, leaving it as is and letting the music do most of the work will be more effective, on top of sounds of the outside world to draw her out of her attack.

I’ve been in touch with Rhiannon Wyn Thompson again, who I’d initially wanted for the role of Ivana, about voicing the Mum in the film. She’s accepted but has informed me that there is only so much she’ll be able to do due to her health, which I’ve reassured her is fine, and that we will go at her own pace. I’ve also got my friend Andi Jackson on board to voice the therapist. They were originally going to just record the scratch track, but their performance was added so much to the character and to how the character should be perceived by Ivana, that I’ve cast them in the final film.

I’m also considering shooting a few more shots to fill out the film. A couple are necessary ones that I just haven’t done yet, including the two drawing shots in the second and final scene, but I’ve also found that the ending as is, which is her sat on the pier being told her mum is recovering, isn’t really much of an ending. Having reconsidered it, I’ve settled on a more definitive closure to the film. The interior shots of the therapy session I shot that introduce us to Ivana I thought would also be a good way to close the film, to bring it full circle. Where the opening of the film ends with her being told about her last session, closing the film on this last session, and not necessarily showing her as having improved would be a good way to show that anxiety isn’t something that can be ‘fixed’ and that therapy isn’t the be all and end all solution to it.

With more distance between now and the shoot, I do feel better about the film now. I feel proud of what we’ve made so far. And I’m eager to finish it and see the final cut. Passion renewed.

Estimated submission date – 31/12/20